UMWELT - Draft 1

UMWELT (Draft 1)

Main Characters 

(Darkness)

INTRO 

Sound of 3/4 waltz beat created with trash and dustbins

There’s a lot of things we don’t notice because we don’t need to. There’s a lot of things we don’t want to know because it’s not convenient. I am all for recycling but you have to admit: it is absurd, to be living in a time where we have to wash our trash only to throw it away into not 1, but 3 different bins. We are constantly trying to salvage humanity’s fuck ups in our already busy and stressful daily routines and it is daunting. Because we know what we mainly try to ignore, is the worst that’s yet to come. Nature functions as one entity - as a dedicated team - that’s armed with an even larger stack of ‘I told you so’s’, coming soon in a cinema near you. 

Sound of water dripping

Lights on. Large thin plastic sheet fills up the stage, moving in the motion of waves 

We rely on the oceans for so many resources, including the air we breath. It regulates the planet’s climate and provides millions of organisms (including us) with food. Governments prefer to invest most of (our) money in wars and in exploring outer space instead of funding research about the salty substance covering 80% of our planet, of which we know very little about. 

Lights off. Curtain drawn. Drum roll

Without further ado, I introduce to one more ‘I told you so’ you didn’t see coming. Noise - the invisible energy we can’t hold in our hands, smell, taste or see - yet another ghost that will haunt your conscious and question your existence and self-worth as a human. One that affects the sacred balance of our wet and fragile ecosystems. Welcome to the underwater world of sound pollution. It’s fun and exciting.

ACT 1

Sound of water dripping

A room. Spotlights slowly carve the darkness. Objects fill the middle of the space.

The insanity of the artist is unveiled.

What the fuck is she trying to communicate?

Sound of water dripping

ACT 2

Read in one breath:

A 7kg brick counterbalances an ice block which are both hanging from the ceiling and attached to the two ends of Rope 1. The brick overshadows a white dinner plate and cutlery on the floor. The ice block adapts to its environment, dripping into a fishbowl which is balancing on one end of a seesaw. On the other side of the seesaw rests a mobile phone. That side of the seesaw is also attached to Rope 2 which hangs from the ceiling. A camouflaged helmet hangs from the rope’s other end. A pillow is hanging at the same height as the helmet, from Rope 3. A plank of wood connects them, its end resting on the top of the helmet and pillow. A cologne bottle and a red lipstick are placed on the plank of wood. As all the items are connected, a chain reaction is produced - the ice-block melts, the brick moves slowly but surely in the direction that can only lead to the smashing of the plate, the seesaw loses its balance, the mobile phone rolls to the ground and the cologne and lipstick fall to the floor as the shelf loses its equilibrium.

ACT 3 

Lights on Brick, White Dinner plate & Cutlery & Ice Block

The sun is going to explode in about 5 billion years. 

But we shouldn’t worry about that. Anxiety is a mindless action causing us to stress about things which are not part of our current reality and will probably never be. It’s irrational and can be the root of heart failure, hair loss, disorientation and insanity: 

A Mediterranean mother’s voice is heard saying: ‘Eat all your vegetables - there are children starving  all over Africa!!!

Person wearing a costume designed to extend her finger tips walks on stage and strokes an audience member.

All fish have a sensory system called the lateral line - it detects gentle currents, pressure changes and vibrations underwater. It acts as a distant touch allowing fish to navigate their underwater environment, helping them find food and protecting themselves from predators. This is the reason why you need to remain still when you see a shark. (And if you're a woman - also try not to menstruate.)

3 words all organisms characterise as an (ideal) home are: safety, peace and shelter.

(‘safety, peace and shelter’ - re-read in the voice of a whale)

Sound of  motor boats underwater

Narrator shouting over engine’s sound: ‘Ah yeah forgot to mention - lateral lines don’t function well when interrupted by ‘other-worldly’ noise.’

Sound of water dripping

ACT 4

Lights on Helmet

Don’t shout underwater. Or fart next to herring. 

Enter lots of extras

In a world where it’s difficult to communicate even if we speak the same language, in a world, where we are not bothered to flick the lever to indicate left or right, it’s hard to imagine that one specific fish can:

Scene is re-enacted by extras 

• defend itself from predators

• communicate for comfort and safety

• maintain a precise and equal distance in between billions of individuals that form a shoal

All just by farting. In each other’s faces. 

Extras exit

Smell of herring emerges on stage, cooked as described below

Herring. Best served salted and freshly cooked over a blazing flame, with plenty of lemon and olive oil.

ACT 5

Lights on pillow

Laws, policies, shipping taxes and everything else that will help you go to sleep 

A person is eating the earth like an apple.

Anthropogenic activities that cause sound pollution

Worldwide: Fossil fuels, Deep Sea-Mining, Drilling for gas and oil

The only thing we know for sure that distinguishes us from other organisms is:

- not our intelligence

- nor our use of language 

- not the vast array of tools we managed to build. 

But the fact that we rely on the necrosphere to survive. 

We are the only species on earth that doesn't rely on the present cycles of nature for survival. We depend on ancient dead organisms found deep in the earth to fuel our way of life, consuming more than we produce.

National: Cyprus

The stage and the person eating the earth is covered in a thin layer of plastic material: ποσσεπαζω - a Cypriot word meaning to cover up completely

Drilling for gas vs Photovoltaics

From the newspaper Cyprus Mail:

“Officials on Tuesday reiterated there currently exists no practical way to bring down energy costs, which have a knock-on effect on the prices of goods… there is essentially no wiggle room to drive down electricity prices unless and until the island switches to natural gas for energy generation.”

We don’t really need to drill for gas as studies have shown we can provide people with sufficient electricity from photovoltaics which can be mounted on the roofs on buildings.

The person eating the earth which is covered in a thin layer of plastic material, burps and then farts.

Local: Limassol

Numbers, percentages, names of companies you never heard of before, unknown terminology and lax laws = more maritime traffic

Tourism

Boats, jet skies and more boats, unprotected biodiversity hotspots not beaming with wild life.

Boat engines are one of the main causes of underwater sound pollution. If you choose to live underwater that sucks, because sound travels 4 x faster in water than in air, reaching distances as far as 25 000km.

The plank of wood with the cologne and red lipstick begins to tip over. The seesaw I losing its equilibrium.

Act 6

Lights on Mobile phone & Power Couple: Cologne & Red Lipstick

Internet Dating and cell phone reception

A ballerina is sitting on the floor swiping on their phone, giggling to themselves. Suddenly an invisible force swipes their mobile phone away. As it flies off into the distance and off stage, the person dramatically (and pointlessly) reaches out their hand in the direction of their fleeting sacred gadget.

Thanks to mobile phones and wifi we now have a social structure that relies on long distance communication. And internet dating. So do all cetaceans for millions of years. 

A human falls in love with a dolphin. They are briefly together but have to separate due to work. They remain in contact and meet every year at the same spot. The dolphin becomes pregnant and has a really ugly baby. The ugly baby and the mother get separated. None of the 3 main characters of this tale find each other again. It’s a really dramatic scene.

ACT 7

Lights on brick, block of ice seesaw, helmet, pillow, mobile phone, cologne and red lipstick

Summary of the below sentence in a ballet dance.

Underwater sound pollution basically destructs marine social systems, can fuck up entire food webs, affects the long-term health of eco-systems and such as coral reefs (which also rely on sounds to thrive) becoming another catalyst to climate change.